Do you warn the new women in your abusive husbands life?

Written by ClareWithTheHair

Do you warn the new women in your abusive husbands life?

You have been subjected to the most horrific abusive hell at the hands of a “man” who professed his love for you and your children, he married you and abused you and in the blink of an eye he has found your replacement so what do you do, Do you warn the new women in your abusive husbands life?

I have battled with this one, everything in me say’s warn her, don’t let someone else live this hell, if she has children do not subject them to this “man’s” abuse. Warn her and hopefully she will have a lucky escape.

But then I know the “man” I initially meet, he was attentive, charming, literally perfection in a man and this is the “man” his new lady is seeing, she see’s this warm, loving, caring, honest, open to a relationship “man”, I know exactly how great this feels, you are literally swept off your feet and I also know he is even a better actor today than he was all those years ago when we began dating.

I also know she has been warned, she has been told I am a liar, I am crazy, I wronged him and she is so much better a woman that I.


He will have all the excuses, all the reason’s he hasn’t seen his daughter, all the reason’s he has no friends, all the excuses are there and he has preempted anything I might say.

So in this instance I have no choice, no options available to me but to stay silent.

I can’t warn this new lady as she will never believe me and I will be doing exactly what he has said I will do.

In any other situation I would never sit back while someone enters the hell I have just removed myself and my girls from but I have no choice, his abuse was so horrific and so bad I have to put the girls and I first and my energy has to go into our heeling.

It would be great for her to get the happy ending, but in all honesty a “man” who can abuse his child and abandon her how he has, a “man” who can sexually, mentally, physically abuse his wife, a “man” who spent years speaking poorly about his family and everyone he has ever come into contact with, is never going to want the happy ending.

Being a bully, abusing us was a hobby he very much enjoyed, the power, the control, the torture, he actually enjoyed, he would turn the happiest moments into a nightmare.

But for now the new lady sees the sales man, but I know this man and I know the lies.

He has a dating profile that lies on every level, age, education, says he has children (see post to understand


He took out car insurance and added me to the policy after we separated(to get a cheaper quote), the insurance was taken out fraudulently therefore is invalid, so god forbid he gets into any accidents.

His CV is a work of absolute lies and fiction, jobs removed, dates changed, roles made up, it is absolute BS.

But today this new lady is being swept off her feet and she will never believe a bad word against him, she will feel like she has won the man lottery, he will be that good.

So as much as I want to tell her how bad an egg she has landed, I can’t, I need my energy to focus on my recovery and I can’t waste time telling someone who does not want to hear it how bad this “man” is.

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Do you warn the new women in your abusive husbands life?


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